Hi-ho, hi-ho, is off with the laundry I go...

Abba's "Dancing Queen" works just as well when replacing these famous lyrics with "Sta Soft queen", the latter of which my sister is convinced I am. And this may very well be true.

My Mom always had someone helping her in the house when we were growing up. I therefore did not do as many chores in the house as I otherwise would have. Even so I had a very attentive eye and always hung around the house watching my Mom do things or explaining how something should be done and why. Good thing I took mental notes since years later I moved to Canada and now I was on my own - in every sense of the word. If I didn't do something myself, it just would not get done - there was no one to help me with no nothing. Ziltch. Nada.

It took me a good few years to find my rhythm, but boy, do I now have the beat. This house is run like a military operation with German precision. My husband will testify to this - loudly and annoyingly. If he dares to leave a piece of clothing just a little too long in one spot, it's in the washing machine, then the dryer, on the ironing board and back in the closet or drawer in no time. He now begs me not to wash certain items and specifically show me said pieces since he uses some for running or gardening or whatever and like some of these items not as brilliantly clean as the rest. He wants some mileage out of some of them...I guess it's a male thing. But on the other hand he proclaims very proudly if he's worn a certain pair of trousers more than once, saying: "see, I save you a ton of laundry". Usually these are pieces that don't even need ironing even if I wash them and therefore it's no trouble washing them in the first place, but he feels he makes his contribution. Thank you dear!

I'm one cleaning machine and can't stand a full basket of dirty laundry, therefor it never gets full since my washing machine is doing at least one load a day. When talking to my family on Skype I almost without exception have to stop them in the middle of the conversation to run to the washing machine to add some Sta Soft (fabric softener). My machine is not like the fancy ones where you can add everything at the beginning of the cycle. My husband constantly wants to replace each and every appliance in the house but I say, don't fix something if it ain't broken.

When we come back from any holiday, whether the trip was a weekend long or 2 weeks, the clothes no sooner left the suitcase than it lands in the laundry room. From there I work my way down until the last piece of holiday wardrobe is done and dusted - ready to go on the next trip. You would never guess we were away at all if I didn't tell you I just came back.

I can only be mad at myself when I ruin one of my beloved blouses or jerseys - yes Mom I know you told me to wash that thing by hand, but I took my chances with the machine... - and I always know exactly where I put everything. No treasure hunts to see where something was put away this time! I know when to buy new cleaning supplies and which one works better than the other. All the small joys in life - they're all mine and I don't have to share my detergent with nobody else. No missing socks in this house either - I kid you not - miracles never cease to happen. I know this may very well change once there's children around the house, but until then I'm queen in my own house - even if it's only the Sta Soft queen.

There's a specific system as to what gets washed when and with what. Very complex indeed and it will be impossible to explain such procedures to anyone so I won't even attempt to do so here. Just trust me when I say that I am the only person for the job. No competition here.

I know it sounds like some kind of obsession - and here I ask you again: why do you say it like it's a bad thing? - but somehow by being so on top of my laundry, gives me a sense of order and control which I don't always have in all aspects of my life. At least I decide when I will do my laundry and how and then I do it exactly as I pretty please to. One doesn't choose where one lives but one can surely choose which day of the week will be laundry day - and in my case it's almost every day!